The Devonshyre Plonkere

Oh, as I wal-ked out one May morning
On a May morning so bright and clear
I saw a bloke coming over the hill
With his finger in his ear
His finger in his ear

How shabbily you're dress-ed young man
How badly smell your feet
Well, I have walk-ed for many a mile
To tend your bleating sheep (BAAAAA)
To tend your bleating sheep

Fair maid, I'll buy you a milk white steed
I'll buy you a dapple grey
And twenty pounds worth of premium bonds
If you'll let me 'ave mi way
If you'll let me 'ave mi way

Oh, you know what you can do with your milk white steed
You can stuff your dapple grey
For I am to be wed to mi darling Ned
A sailor bold and gay
A sailor bold and gay

Oh, but your darling Ned has sail-ed away
Upon the deep blue sea
Upon the banks of Ow-stray-lee-aye-ay
With an aborigin-aye-eee
With an aborigin-aye-eee

Oh, he took-ed her to a wayside inn
'Twas in the good beer guide
And she was gasping for a gin
But he left her outside(the sod!)
Oh, how bitterly she cried

Oh, I don't know what to make of you
You promis-ed me your heart
You said you'd only have one ale or two
But you're as piss-ed as a fart
As piss-ed as a fart

Oh, but I will get my articles
And I'll get my degree
And I will get stuck-ed in a silly job
If you will stay with me
If you will stay with me

So girls pay 'eed to what I say
Or you'll have trouble at your door
You'll end up marri - aye- ed to a solicitor's clerk
With children two point four
With children two point four.